Working while waiting

I have been back at work since Wednesday and expect to be working Monday and Tuesday this week as well. I hope by then, a diagnosis will be derived from the biopsy and I will know where I stand.

It is probably not sensible, but having an operation, even as an outpatient, worries me more than Chemo.

Being back at work has been a bit tiring. Driving to work aggravates the pain in the leg and my poor co-workers are uncomfortable watching me hobble around. I think its those who know about the testicular cancer because, despite me telling them that the lump is much higher up, almost on my hip, these guys are imagining having a tumour on the testicle. (There was nothing painful about that, 8 years ago, until they operated. I could have gone some time not worrying about it, had Lan not insisted - thank goodness.]

What I have found is that the pain is less at work than at home, I assume because work takes my mind off it. So I was worrying about this weekend. In fact it was no problem and I even pottered around the market, to see the Cultural Jamboree on Saturday. On Sunday friends took us out to the Thai Buffet at the Pacific, Manchester Chinatown. Later I took a slow stroll across the antique bridge, to be demolished tomorrow and through the new Mersey Vale Nature Park. So far, all that is new about the nature park is the rather absurd Seeds of Change statue.

So may be it is stress related. But that is rather odd, for I am getting very little stress at work. Having handed all my work over to others and not being sure I will be around for long, I just have bits and pieces to do and can almost choose my tasks.